50 Cold Puns That Will Make You Quiver

This list of cold puns is open to contribution. If you’d like to add a cold pun to it, please submit it to us using the comments section below.

When you hear the following words, tell me about the first word that comes to your mind. Here they are Ice cream, snow, winter, Arctic, Antarctica, Greenland, windchill, ice cube, and the polar vortex. If you are thinking of the word ‘cold,’ then you are bang on! Maybe you were thinking of the word ‘freezing,’ but that is pretty much the same thing. But some things are not so bad cold; as I said, ice cream is something that you can love that is cold and eat it pretty much at any time of the year.

Sometimes having cold drinks such as ice tea is also quite welcoming – especially when you want to have one during a hot summer day. Cold pop and cold beer are good too. However, you don’t want your home to be cold when you want to be comfortable, or else you will need to wear hot sweaters. On the flip side, you don’t want your house to be too warm. Because what happens when you get too cold? You will shiver and quiver. That makes you feel quite uncomfortable. What else can be said about anything cold? Oh, I don’t know; maybe we can make some puns out of it, though. Here are 50 cold puns that are guaranteed to make you quiver.

List of Cold Puns That Will Make You Quiver:

Following are some of the best cold puns that will make you quiver:

The snowman was mad at me because he was acting pretty cold.
How do you get access to a frigid beer that seems inaccessible? Just crack open a cold one.
What do you call luggage in the freezer? A cold case.
The stew is not just cold but it is a little chili.
Why did the snowlady not show concern over the melting snowman? She is cold hearted.
What do you call killing reptiles for the sake of it? Murdering in cold blood.
If the ice house falls, igloo it back together.
I fell on the ice and no one around me cared as they just gave me the cold shoulder.
Why were the ice skating rinks not fixed? The maintenance crew slipped up on it.
The owner of the ice cream parlor has a side hustle which is teaching at Sunday school.
Why does Paula Abdul think that reptiles have frigid hearts? She has a song called ‘Cold Hearted Snake’.
Why can’t anyone get a job at the ice skating rink? There is a hiring freeze right now.
Why did the computer suddenly turn to ice? It became frozen.
How does a snowman become emotional since he is normally so cold? He boils with anger and lets off steam.
It will stop snowing then it will rain after, but lets go to the ice cream shop when it rains because there will be sprinkles.
Why did the groom run off after waking up from sleeping in a bathtub of ice? He got cold feet.
Why do dogs often become distant after being affectionate? They have warm hearts but cold noses.
What can happen if you spend a few minutes in a freezer? You will catch a cold.
If you want to chat, lets go to the frozen pond because it is the best place to break the ice.
He became distant and cold, and ice-o-lated himself.
What are the offspring of snowpeople called? Chill-dren.
What can happen if you come in contact with a vampire snowman? You will get a frost bite.
The snowman ignored me and gave me the cold shoulder.
If you want to catch something with your eyes closed in the middle of a wintery walk, the only thing you will catch is a cold.
Why do musicians keep their trumpets in freezers during the summer? People like cool music.
Don’t laugh at me because of my cold. I mean it snot funny.
The cold always comes at the end of the year weather you like it or not unless you live in the southern hemisphere.
When you said you did not like cold puns, that is so cold and insensitive.
Getting into an accident on a winter day is snow laughing matter.
It’s cold outside so come inside for some coffee to go and chill.
Why is the band Foreigner always freezing? They are as cold as ice.
It’s cold outside. Why don’t you come in for some soup and let’s chill.
Let’s spend time in nature outdoors weather or not it is cold.
When you walk on the icy lake, that is a sign that you need to brave the cold winter.
There is nothing better than taking cold candy on a snow cup.
The winter plowman forgot to send us a contract to work over the winter, what a snow-flake.
Why would you get upset when I told you that you are emotionally cold? You are such a snowflake.
What do you call a winter party that is outdoors in the cold? A snowball.
What is the best diet in cold weather? Icebergs and chili sauce.
The cake I took out of the fridge is so cold and it has double-icing.
I had to run into the building because it is so cold but ice to meet you anyway.
Where do you save your money during the winter? In the snowbank.
What meal is the best one to order during a cold day? Iceburgers.
I am getting a divorce because my spouse is cold and is a flake.
Why do you need to wear socks when it is cold out? Because it is not a good idea to go brrrfoot.
How do you scare snowmen in the winter cold? Get them a hairdryer.
These cold puns are pretty cool.
I wanted to tell you a joke about ice, but it slipped my mind.
That is pretty cold of you to not like my jokes about winter.
There are scientists who want to keep working with thin ice and they are about to have a breakthrough.