50 Doctor And Nurse Puns That Are Prescription for Laughter

This list of doctor and nurse puns is open to contribution. If you’d like to add a doctor and nurse pun to it, please submit it to us using the comments section below.

No one wants to go to the doctor, and that is why so many people put off their annual checkups because really, who wants to go to the doctor? But the fact of the matter is that if you want to stay healthy, you need to get your checkups and take any prescribed medication. Allow the nurse as well to provide you the care that you need. What can make the visit to the doctor’s office a little less grueling? Perhaps if we were to come up with some puns that have to do with doctors and nurses, that may be the perfect prescription for laughs. So let’s now go over 50 doctor and nurse puns that will make you laugh now!

List of Doctor and Nurse Puns That Are Prescription for Laughter:

Following are some of the best doctor and nurse puns that are prescription for laughter:

1. The intuitive doctor knew what was wrong with patients by using his sick sense.
2. Brain surgeons schedule surgery so early in the morning only so they can work ahead.
3. The dermatologist laugh at the surgeon’s joke all because it was an inside job.
4. The doctor wins the best surgical oncologist award since his mastectomy work was breast-taking.
5. The doctor said to not have a heart attack during the game of charades.
6. There is one thing that transplant doctors are the most afraid of and that is rejection.
7. The fact is that psychologists analyze, but proctologists anal-ize.
8. The proctologist quit because of being sick of being the butt of all these shitty jokes.
9. When orthopedic surgeons lose their medical licenses is so unorthodocs.
10. The patient was afraid the surgeon could not handle his hepatectomy, but the doctor did de-liver.
11. The nurse had enough at the nursing home since it was the same old, same old day and night.
12. How do you know if the nurse did not take the patient’s temperature? It is because it was still there.
13. There is one place that plastic surgeons get new noses and that is at the olfactory.
14. You will never hear a psychologist use the bathroom since the P is silent.
15. Doctors make the best jedi since a jedi must have patients.
16. The doctor stops studying extraterrestrial medicine since he could not find the patients.
17. The NASA doctor said to the rocket ship that it was time for a booster shot.
18. A doctor who lives at a tent-filled resort to treat visitor’s afflictions is a camp-pain manager.
19. There is a big difference between a podiatrist and a urologist as one is happier if you give him a foot.
20. There is one thing about urine and it is the opposite of you’re out.
21. Urologists can be so narcissistic since it is all about number one.
22. I wanted to hear the joke about the panspermia germ but it is maybe best for it to not be spread around.
23. Since Watson is not the most famous doctor in England, you gotta wonder Who is?
24. The only difference between a neurologist and a urologist is nothing if you are a dickhead.
25. An atheist urologist is an apostate feelin’ your prostate.
26. The baby born in the high-tech delivery room was cordless.
27. The doctor sends the porn star home after her exam since she was X-rated.
28. When a doctor tests your physical fitness level is known as looking at the vigor picture.
29. The orthopedic doctor became a room-atologist. after he retired and bought a hotel.
30. A Greek back doctor who isn’t a physician is known as a gyropractor.
31. You trust the doctors who are repairing your slipped disk since they have your back.
32. Sick people call some treatment instructions from doctors ill advised.
33. A doctor sitting on the floor whole treating his patients is the Lotus Physician.
34. Doctor puns are no longer funny since I have an irony deficiency.
35. The nurse wanted to go to art school to learn to draw blood.
36. The fact of the matter is that 9 out of 10 injections are in vein.
37. The big difference between hematologists and urologists is that one pricks your finger.
38. There was a board game popular among doctors and it was known as Scribble.
39. A nurse who has a really bad day is always needling everyone.
40. The nurse put in her notes that the patient refused to have an autopsy.
41. The nurse quit her job since the pay was measle-ly.
42. The nurse said that her phone just died, and then the doctor said to call it.
43. The doctor said to the sick guy that he was sorry for the long wait, and the guy told him not to worry since he is patient.
44. The administer who cares for you if you’re laid up in a Scandinavian hospital is a registered Norse.
45. When the patient told the doctor that he swallowed a spoon, the doctor told him to sit down and not to stir.
46. What do you call a duck who is very bossy at a clinic? A nurse quack-titioner.
47. The doctor who was smug yelled to the judge that he was trying his patients.
48. The doctor wanted to reassure his patients about the bird flu by saying it is tweetable.
49. The patient was worried about the fact that there was not a clock beside his hospital bed, and the doctor told him to not be alarmed.
50. A patient told his psychiatrist about nightmares about a massive void and the psychiatrist said that the dream meant nothing.

There you go, here are 50 doctor and nurse puns that you can read before going to see the doctor in the future. Maybe that will help you calm and give you more patients while waiting in the waiting room as well! Good luck if today is the day that you have to see the doctor!

Do you wish to add your own doctor and nurse pun to the list?

Feel free to let us know using the comments section below.